So as of late so much has happened:
Moved out and to an apt downtown.
Loc'ing my hair and I think this look working for me.
Newly single and I love it because it wasn't any negative reason behind it, we just saw we were at dif points of life.
All in all I'm am truly blessed, even though there have been hectic and stressful times. I just see there is more positive in my life than negative so I smile. Anywho just dropping a note and an updated pic.
Smooches!
~Rae~
We, of the fatherless tribe, tend to love differently than most. We have no true recollections of man hood or how they may pertain to our womanhood. The concept of a true and sincere love experience escapes us the like the fathers we never had. Yet, we blindly search for the very love we like to believe we were created in. See we of the fatherless tribe find comfort in the things we once saw our very own mothers cling so tightly to. The love of the man that sets precedence over all love there after.
... to be continued.
Shout out to the muhfuckas that thought that they could trump me in life... Ha! I still got the winning hand!
I came to the realization today that I am settled. I am happy and content in most areas in my life. Yea I know I have been reading a certain someone's blog, and I sorta feel for him. Even though we have had our issues... I still feel like its unfair that he hasn't bounced back as quickly or to the space he once was because of me. With that said, I am glad that things are in a place for me to grow and be happy. I mean its been a journey and a learning experience when it comes to relationships.
To be continued...
Man I spent 360 dollars on some clothes I will never get to wear. Like its a revelation that this relationship is madd serious. At least for me its a revelation. He knew he was in this till the wheels fall off and there was no momentum left. I, on the other hand, was taking it real day to day like, until last night. Needless to say he got clothes and I got a wake up call. The fact I love him so much and trust that this is the real thing. Shows some progress on my end when it comes to relationships. So I guess...
He and I are just gon have to make a date cuz I'm not letting go.
April 18, 2010 we still going.
*Rae*
Random day of recollection led me to this blog rant:
I find it funny how people always have something to say about being mistreated, but they were never saints themselves. Like I have to ex's that would swear til they died I did them sooo wrong. Yet lord knows if u peeked into the situation they were not saints themselves. For one Alonzo was a cheater but he swore I broke his heart and did him wrong. Like bruh I caught u with the girl and to Dick out.... you were wrong. Not to mention the time we were at to fams house and this 15 year old girl comes down and tries to front me like she grown. Real talk if u weren't fucking and or feeding into her shit she wouldn't come at me like she was yo other woman. So to him I say u so full of shit its ridiculous and you can continue to wish we could talk again. Sadly you are shit out of luck.
Now there was an ex named Rick and he thought and still thinks he did no wrong in our relationship. I'm not going to go in great detail but I will say this... You can't expect some one to help you or put up with u, if u aren't doing shit to help ur self. You were grown as hell with nothing but a sad story and excuse. Yea everyone has problems and issues bit u hold on so much u can drag others down. So when u look back and wonder why all these girls left and leave u look at the fact some of the reason may be you. I hope you have grown and gotten better. If not u will be a lonely single borderline bum for the rest of your days.
Now I can't close this blog with out putting myself on blast. I for one can be a bitch... for the most part I'm sweet, but if I feel things are going sour or against me... I will not hesitate to get in my "get you" mode. To some men I have been with I have done some not so nice things but always for a reason. So if I have treated u super bold think back to what u might have done. Simply because I don't do u dirty for no reason. You might think its no reason, but its a reason. Also cheating I'm not big on especially if I feel u are to good to lose so it has been very few I cheated on. The ones I did cheat on well u deserved it, its always tit for tat with me. You did your tit and I did the tat. Lastly I can be very indecisive and free spirited so sometimes I can switch up and leave a person in a daze. Sorry that's just me. None the less I am working on being better and I am with a man that gives me no reason to turn my sinner on. So for that I am blessed.
Till next time...
*Rae*
So the 12th of December was my dad's birthday. I didn't cry and I actually made it quite fine through the day. My boyfriend is to sweet with his kind words on that day. Its amazing how so much has changed in the past few years. My life isn't perfect but its better than before... I wish my dad was here to see and be apart of the holidays. It's just so sad to my Aunti and Granny hold in the hurt and cry their tears when they think no one is looking. It's so painful, but imma be strong and make it past Xmas.
So yea I finally found the app for Blogger on my Evo. Somehow during this hiatus someone felt the need to write about what they think they know about me. Well in a polite manner let me clarify.
First of all the whole daddy and rape reference is over-the-top simply because I faced that long time ago. So please stop making that the base of your existence. Secondly after being in a relationship with you, I realized that I'm not really fond of them period. Luckily I found a man that I don't mind being tied to and we are tied quite well. Also if learned to accept responsibility and stop making others your priority you might get out of your hole. It's sad u trust any and every one with a willing ear, yet u point the insecurity word at others. So in conclusion I hope that instead of u thinking I'm oh so sad off u take a look in the mirror and chart your progression, because mine is quite steady. Futhermore I am not living in the same mindset from years ago.
Get it together!
~Rae~
This song and video says it all when it comes to my view on love...
Dedicated to the one that loved me harder than any other man I know...
~*~Rae~*~
Taught me how to put on eye liner so now I always wear it. I dunno why the memory of that woman always stands out in my mind but it does. I wish I could have one more make-up session with her a Poopah...
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®
The 18 marked the 6th month anniversary of my Boyfriend and I! My babe took me out to the movies and dinner... To bad I couldn't stay with him much longer after to have sum extra fun. I had to head home cuz I was feeling sick. I think some one gave me their sick germs. Overall it was a lovely day and I pray we make it through many more days! The rest of my bf rant will be continued next blog... I think. Lol! Anywho goodnight and holla!
*Rae*
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®
